If you know me, you know I'm not all sunshine, puppies and butterflies.
So I must pay homage to my ghetto side: (Ghetto side you say? I blame Coolio, Columbus, and those two Felons I dated)
I've put the same song with two different versions. Of the two people that read this, I doubt you will listen to either.
Mary J. Blige- Someone to Love me (ft. Lil Wayne and Diddy)
Diddy- Someone to Love me (ft. Mary J. Blige)
It has finally happened. I've spent enough time alone. I've dealt with the crap for too long now.
I don't like carrying 30 lbs of cat litter up three flights of steps, along with 8 rolls of paper towels and an umbrella.
Nor do I like painting an apartment with 18 foot ceilings by myself.
I don't like taking my dog out 3 times a day and for the past two weeks each and every time it's been raining.
I don't like going places I hate alone- like the oil change place,car dealerships, or Wal-Mart.
I don't like experiencing fun things with my family and wishing I had someone to share it with.
I don't like when my dog seriously creeps me out by randomly growling at "something" in the hall way.
I don't like being alone and afraid at night. (Little ghost girl has forever ruined me)
I just don't like it anymore. It's old now.
I've proven I can do it. Now I'm done with it.
The problem is not even all of these little reasons above combined to create some overwhelming sense of loneliness. It's the fact that I'm seriously..beginning to hate pretty much- EVERYTHING else in life too.
I fear I'm becoming a bitter person intent on a self prophesizing goal of - DOOM.
I'm starting to hate things that I shouldn't hate. Like- getting up in the morning.Or- Brushing my hair. And- cleaning my house.
I want to make dinner for someone who will eat with me more than once in a blue moon.
I want to go see a movie with a man who will hold my damn hand.
I want to be looked at like I'm truly special.
I want someone to be there for me when I think my sister might be dead.
I want someone to love me enough to scoop the cat litter.